These are some questions that parents commonly ask me about sleep training and the methods I employ. Please do get in touch if you cannot find an answer to your questions.
I am trained in several methods to support babies and children to self-settle, the most common being a 'gradual retreat' type approach. This is the most gentle method of sleep training and allows a caregiver to be right there next to their baby, offering physical comfort and talking to them whilst also providing the time and space needed to learn this new skill for themselves. My sleep support plans are tailored to each individual family and their needs and preferences, so you can be assured that together we will take the right approach for you and your child.
No. The cry-it-out method is when you put your child down awake, leave the room and don’t come back, regardless of how much they cry. As a mum, I would have found this method of sleep training unbearable and so I would find it very difficult to advocate for and encourage a parent to use an approach that I felt uncomfortable with myself. I will not ask you to leave your child alone to cry for extended periods - with my most commonly used approach, you are right next to your child, able to speak to and comfort them, until they are ready for a little more independence. This journey to independent sleeping is different for every child and every family - though I can't promise there will be no tears, I will work with you to ensure that you are as comfortable as possible throughout the process.
Parents often ask this question - the answer is that it depends on a multitude of factors and is individual to every family. All babies* can learn to fall asleep by themselves - it is an innate skill just like learning to walk or crawl - however, the parents themselves must be ready to enter into sleep training and this is a very personal decision. The benefits of getting adequate, restorative sleep are significant - I am trained to support you and your family to get that sleep in a supportive, step-by-step way that you feel comfortable with, but only when you are ready.
*My newborn plan is about encouraging positive sleep habits rather than sleep training.
Unfortunately, I can almost promise that there will be some crying. When we make changes to our rules or instil a boundary, it is highly likely to be met with some protest. For babies and young children, their only form of communicating this protest is through tears. Rules around chocolate for breakfast or not running next to a busy road are somehow easier to enforce and apply consistently - rules around sleep can be very emotive and hearing our little ones cry, especially when we are tired ourselves, can be really (really) tough. Please remember that ahead of being a Sleep Consultant, I am a mum - I've been there and I know that feeling. I also remember sleep deprivation well and knew that getting more sleep meant I could be a better mum. If you would like a frank and honest conversation about sleep training and crying, book a 15 minute call with me so that we can chat it through.
I provide every client with a service tailored to their individual circumstances and needs. Unfortunately, I can't provide guarantees that your child will be e.g. sleeping through in a certain number of days - every child and family situation is different and success, and the speed in which results are achieved, is dependent on parents' commitment to implementing the plan in full. I can, however, assure you that I will work with you, utilising my experience and knowledge to support you to achieve your goals.
If co-sleeping works* for you and your family, then it works for you and your family - there's no judgement here! I've been there, done that (though I'll admit that, for us, co-sleeping was rarely the fairy tale scenario I imagined)!
If, however, co-sleeping is no longer working for you, then I would be happy to discuss how I can support your transition away from co-sleeping.
*if you choose to co-sleep, please ensure that the guidance for safer sleep is followed to reduce the risk of SIDS - see the Lullaby Trust for details
If feeding to sleep (breast or bottle) is working for you right now, then there is no real reason to change it. I breastfed my son to sleep many, many times and usually enjoyed doing so! After my son made it clear that breastfeeding to sleep was his chosen method 3, 4 or 5 times a night, however, it was time for me to support him to learn a new way to fall asleep.
Did this affect our bond? I like to think it didn't - I wanted to continue to breastfeed and I did just that, just away from sleep situations. I can certainly say that I love him today more than I ever have and I also know that I am a better, more patient parent when I am getting the restorative sleep that I need! If this is something that you are worried about, please do reach out - supporting your child to learn to fall asleep without needing to be fed to sleep can be done in a gentle, nurturing way.
Yes - you can parent in any way you choose! If what you are doing right now is working for you and your family, then there is no reason to change it.
If, however, your sleep is getting interrupted by supporting your child to get to sleep this way and it's no longer working for you, then please do get in touch.
A sleep 'prop' is anything that your child (or you!) believe you need in order to fall asleep. This could be rocking, patting, sucking (e.g. on a dummy or cuddly toy/comforter), feeding (breast or bottle), holding mummy or daddy's hair, white noise...the list goes on! Props can be 'neutral' and not cause an issue at all (e.g. white noise) but can be troublesome where a baby or child needs parental input in order to facilitate their prop. Rocking a baby to sleep might be dreamy the first, second or hundredth time, but when you're at work in the morning and your 10 month old is not as light as they once were, you have a bad back and you're rocking your baby to sleep for the fourth time in a night, you might be ready to move away from that motion-induced sleep prop! If you would like help in supporting your child to move towards independent sleep, please do get in touch.
I am trained to work with children up to about 10 years of age so would be happy to discuss any sleep challenges you may be experiencing with older children.
Download my free pdf guide to read the solutions for the three most common issues with little ones and their sleep!
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